


He Is Not Your Type

by assez



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, Romance, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-12
Updated: 2018-08-12
Packaged: 2019-06-26 08:36:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15659646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/assez/pseuds/assez
Summary: They were not meant to be together, everybody told them so. Yet, despite every word uttered to them, every advice against it, every proof to the contrary, somehow, they ended up with one another.





	He Is Not Your Type

\- You know, Severus, Harry is just not your type. With his admiration of all kind of sports, his athlete type of figure, all his fans trying to stick their tongue into his mouth and hands into his pants – and you know how possessive and jealous you can get – his beautiful green eyes and wit but simple kind of humor that you just detest because it _bores you_ awfully.  
He is prone to do mistakes just spectacular. He is just not a studying type, and you love studying, HE loves going out and hanging with friends, you, with all due respect, detest people – they are making noise, smell and talk utter shit. Harry love life, you examine death. He was made by god, you were made by devil. You are clever, intelligent and interesting, he is plain and boring. Just listen to me – it will not work.  
\- Is that all? Asked Severus after cool assesment of the do-gooder.  
\- Yep.  
\- Get out.

\- You know Harry, Severus is just not your type with all the smart wit, cunny jokes, passion for book and calm activities, brewing potions, academic skills and all, a teacher with his whole being while you detest any learning – it kind of wouldn't work. He creates dark magic, you take care of old, babies and helpless hurt animals. You help creatures, he vivisects them. He is old and hanging with specimens of his own kind, you are generous and try to talk and be a good friend with anybody and everybody available. You love everybody and are a giving person, he hates everybody, spites at them hateful words and is constantly taking and taking and taking – he will suck out your soul and you won’t even notice it! He kills people without a blink of an eye, you try to save them. You young, and good and nice, he is nasty, greasy bastard, who doesn’t wah his hair, snarky, mean, bad killer, unpleasant, unforgiving. He has a too long, crooked nose and hands dirty from potions fumes and digging in soil. He can’t love. He can’t even like somebody. He must thin g about us as snots who ruined his life by constantly trying to save world while he tried to save our sorry asses. He is a mad genius and we are just obstacles to his happy life. You can’t even mean seriously – he hated your father! He was in love with your mum, he killed your godfather – you can’t be serious in dating him! Is this some kind of savior thing Hermione constantly talks about? You know, there exist therapists for that… And let’s just not forget – you are honest and kind and funny, and you could have _anybody_ \- so why _him_? And you want family – you always wanted to have one – big one – just like mine is. It won’t be possible if – and believe me, you would be a great father, super one, kids would love you – but _not - HIM_ \- definitely not him.  
\- Will that be all? asked Harry coldly.  
\- Yes.  
\- Okay. Now please go. Just please – leave.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°° 

\- Pair of socks?  
\- Done.  
Tick.  
\- A shirt?  
\- Done.  
Tick.  
\- A passport?  
\- Done.  
Tick.  
Air ticket?  
\- Done.  
Tick.  
\- Diapers?  
\- Done.  
Tick.  
\- Glasses.  
\- On.  
Scowl: - A sunglasses.  
A look into the trunk: - Done.  
Tick.  
\- All right, your turn.  
\- Kid?  
\- Yes.  
Scrawl.  
\- Medicines?  
\- Yes.  
Scrawl.  
\- Tubes?  
\- Yes.  
Scrawl.  
\- Glasses?  
\- I don’t wear glasses.  
\- You should.  
A second. Then a minute. A reluctant: - Probably.  
\- Prescriptions?  
Warily: - What for?  
\- Medicines.  
\- Yes.  
Scrawl.  
\- Prescriptions for glasses.  
\- Potter!  
\- Fine, fine… scrawl. – Socks?  
\- Yes.  
\- Milk?  
\- Yes.  
Scrawl.  
\- Spade?  
\- Yes.  
\- Shovel?  
\- Yes.  
\- Blade?  
\- Yes.  
Scrawl.  
\- Our miniaturized greenhouse?  
\- Yes.  
Scrawl.  
\- Glasses?  
\- Potter!  
\- OK, OK, Kid?  
\- As you can see…  
\- Oh… well… that is that, then.  
\- All right – I shall activate the portkey, then.  
\- Yes – um… Severus?  
Severus turned to look at Harry: - Yes?  
\- Um… I love out gardening.  
Severus looked at him for a long time before turning back to the fireplace.  
\- Severus?  
Patiently, Severus turned back to Harry again.  
\- I am probably not even normal, stated Harry timidly.  
\- Calm down, Potter. I don’t do normal, he said before he, finally, got to order their first holiday together.

And second.

And thirty.  
And thirty-two.

The fifth...


End file.
